Attention! Attention!

I have some cool news about my blog! I’m expanding it to other platforms! I am now going to be posting weekly on Tumblr.

This past week has thrown me for a loop. And it’s kind of ironic that this happened the way it did.

After writing my post about menstruation and mentioning that I thought I might be done with mine….I started my period. I was in shock of course. Because normally, my periods are very consistent. They come almost exactly 30 days apart every month. And I was already a week late. But more than that, I was so upset. I felt the need to cry so deep in my heart. I don’t know why the tears just wouldn’t come out. Maybe the hormones, idk. But because of the fact that I couldn’t cry it out, my emotions were building up inside of me so fast that I felt like I was carrying the universe on my shoulders and a 50 pound frog in my throat. I didn’t know what to do other than write. And man did I write.

I wrote a piece that I entitled “When A Guy Gets His Period.” I had no intentions of making it so deep and sounding so vulnerable but I think I literally wrote it from the bottom of my soul. I was hurting so bad and writing so fast, I didn’t even stop to read what I was writing until I was done. And I was done in under 3 minutes.

So this piece turned out to be a little too raw for this blog here. I couldn’t figure out a way to make it fit into my writing theme here. And I like to keep a recurring theme so I didn’t want to throw something at you guys that was this unexpected. Hell, I even scared my self a bit. I def did not want to scare my readers away.

So I decided to put my lonely Tumblr blog into good use. I posted this piece on my Tumblr and created a new blog called “It’s That Time Again.” Inspired by “that time of month.” But also by my random and ongoing thoughts at every hour of the day. My titles all have their own unique time stamp that directly reflects what time I wrote each piece. I will give you a preview of the work I will post here.

Keep in mind…these are my thoughts…uncut, unedited, unscripted, and as raw as can be. You’ll get an even deeper look into the mind of a trans person. And I’m sure there will be something you’ll relate to. We all have our own story but a lot of our stories are intertwined. It’s nice to see sometimes that we never have to go through something alone. Someone out there understands your pain.

When A Guy Gets His Period

See…I thought we were done.

Now I know you were just hiding.

But now what?

You just decided to come back?

For what? For fun? For laughs?

This is NOT fun. This is not funny.

You’re just a destructive reminder.

A constant reminder that there’s always something.

Something that I’m doing wrong.

Something that will upset the people I love.

Something that will make me inferior.

But I wanted grandbabies! They say.

So you’re never gonna have kids? They say.

You can have this inheritance when you have kids…HA-HA. They say.

Funny thing is…I have two beautiful children.

They may not be my blood.

But that doesn’t make them any less mine.

And that doesn’t make me any less a mother.

Or a father.

This is what God gave me.

This is the life that I chose to live.

And the people I chose and was made to love.

And besides my gender.

Or the fact that I never wanted to have my own babies.

It’s sad. Not funny.

That you can’t recognize THAT.

You can’t recognize that I AM a parent.

No matter if I spent 9 months baking the little shits.

They’re still my little shits.

And I love them as if they were my blood.

Because sometimes…LOVE brings you closer than blood.

Love is thicker than blood.

Especially your blood. Believe that.

So what the fuck do I need this blood for!

It’s just a constant reminder that

No matter what.

I will never be good enough.

My family will never be family enough.

I will never be woman enough.

Or man enough.

And it’s so damn sad! Not funny.

When a guy gets his period.

Link to my Tumblr : It’s That Time Again

Thanks for reading!

Talk soon

– Brixton

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2 comments

  1. I’m glad you did share because none of that would have occurred to me. I think the more people who know what you go through the better. To know and understand that it’s not just “being an attention whore” – to appreciate the enormity of the decision and the process. I don’t think there’s a person alive who appreciates menstruation! My friends boyfriend calls it “shark week” which I actually find pretty hilarious. Another thought – to try and give it a positive spin for you, is that it too is a transition. Making way for a new fertile ground to start a new life so maybe, it’s an omen. Onwards and upwards!

    Liked by 1 person

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